Oh, Tarquin, isn't Sir David Attenborough just a marvel? He's such an inspiration to us all with his animal documentaries and his plastic bags. He is 95 you know – and still holding his own on the international stage.

His speech to that climate change conference was such a breath of fresh air. None of that whining about the doom and gloom you get from the sandal-wearing mob. I mean, I would utterly ignore their drivel, but Sir David has made me think. Just like the time he did that plastic bag documentary – I was moved to buy myself a bamboo drinking straw and a Kath Kidson tote, you know.