Gosh Tarquin, all this to-ing and fro-ing between London and the Home Counties really is a bit of a bind. It was all so much easier when we were in lockdown and could just stay in one place. You didn't have to go to school, Daddy didn't have to go to work to support the sandwich industry – we could even Eat Out to Help Out in Bray.

Now it seems it's all about getting cities back up and running. What about the countryside, I say. We jolly well ought to get it going. Apparently the Government has got a plan. Something to do with making lots of Mayors – like Daddy's friend from the Rotary Club – and going back to the old historical county names.