Gosh, Tarquin, mummy just has so much to do. I'm sure everything used to go quiet in August, and we all toddled off to Tuscany for a month to drink Prosecco.

We would all relax, have fun and take stock. Mummy used to have some thinking time to come back after the summer, with all sorts of fresh ideas for dinner parties and soirees. Come September, when you were back off to school, I was all ready for my next round of classes – Italian, floristry, sushi making, art appreciation... I learned so many useful skills.