Whenever there's a cock-up we used to say so-and-so couldn't organise a booze-up in a brewery. Now we can just say so-and-so couldn't plan a coach trip to Calais.

I mean, those poor schoolkids stuck on a coach at Dover for hours on end while the jobworths examine every passport with a magnifying glass. The fact is, I blame the Government totally. You can't tell me they couldn't see it coming. Anyone who's left this island since 2021 knows the jobsworths want everything down to your inside leg measurements before they let you through passport control. And it's bleeding obvious now Covid is history that all the schools would want to bring back foreign trips.