Blimey, what's the deal with these councils suddenly going down the Swanee? I thought your average council officer was as boring as hell, but at least safe with our lolly, unlike these charlatans in Whitehall who think taxes are a giant tub of sweeties.

I mean, being a council jobsworth isn't exactly rocket science. In come all them parking fines and council tax one end and out goes a few bob to charge up the bin lorries and buy a few brooms for the roadsweepers and bish bash bosh, job's done.